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Little fact—Thailand’s got this style, Nuad Bo’Rarn. Ancient as heck, monks started it. Stretchin’ and rubbin’, erotic twist snuck in later. Bet those monks didn’t see THAT comin’! Haha, can you imagine? “Great Scott, Brother Chai’s hands are WANDERING!” Hilarious. Oh, and Japan—Nuru massage. Slippery seaweed gel, bodies glidin’—wild! Too messy for me, tho. I’d fall off the damn table.

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the Plaza de Recreo. It’s a nice spot, ya know? Families chillin’, kids runnin’ around. But then, outta nowhere, this kid trips and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Ugh! I’m like, “Dude, really?!” But then he looks up at me with those big puppy eyes, and I can’t even be mad. I just laugh it off. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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