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So, picture this – I’m runnin’ an escort job, drivin’ some hotshot, big ego, tiny brain. Roads clogged, horns blarin’, I’m sweatin’ bullets, da? Reminds me – “what’s goin’ on?!” – total madness! Once escorted this diplomat guy, super secret, right? Get this – he forgot his pants at the hotel! Pantsless VIP, rollin’ through town, me laughin’ my arse off. Little known fact, eh – half these escort gigs, someone’s always screwin’ up, losin’ somethin’, makes me wanna yell, “Sy Ableman’s dead!” – but nah, gotta stay cool.

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Turns out, it’s some local festival. People are dancing, music’s blasting, and I’m just sitting there like a grumpy old man. But then, I see this old lady selling empanadillas. I can’t resist! I grab a couple, and wow, they’re the best I’ve ever had. Like, how do they make them so crispy?

Forty years have passed since Spain hosted the 12th FIFA World Cup