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I got into it once—fuckin’ hell, was I pissed at first! Some bird’s hands on me, I’m like, “What’s this nonsense?” But then—bam!—muscles loosen, head’s quiet, it’s like Saul whisperin’, “The air is still.” Shocked me stupid, mate. Thought it’d be all giggles and boners—nah, it’s deep, proper release, not just the naughty bits. Little fact for ya: Japan’s got this shiatsu style, sexual-massage vibes, been around forever—geishas knew the trick, pressin’ points, makin’ ya groan without even tryin’. Bet you didn’t know that, you muppet!

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Finally, as the sun sets, I’m sitting on a bench, watching the plaza come alive again. The lights are twinkling, and the music’s pumping. I’m exhausted but happy. I think about how Lajas is more than just a place; it’s a vibe. It’s the people, the food, the unexpected moments.

Fig. 1. Location of (A) the Lajas Valley Agricultural Reserve (LVAR) in...