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Here’s a story—heard from a buddy in the field. This one chick, swear she glowed after a session. Said it “unlocked her soul.” I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Girl, it’s just a massage!” But nah, she’s all “A memory changes the memory!”—straight outta the movie! Made me laugh, but also—huh? Maybe there’s somethin’ to it. Or maybe she’s nuts. Jury’s out.

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First off, I hit the road on Calle Juan Ponce de León. Traffic was a nightmare. I mean, come on! It’s Juana-Diaz, not New York City! I’m stuck behind this old truck that’s moving slower than molasses. I’m yelling at my steering wheel, “C’mon, man! We got cargo to move!”

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