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I rememba dis one time – true story, swear on my minions! Dis chick, she send me foto, all naked-like, but it’s blurry, like Doc Sportello’s brain on dope! I’m like, “Vhat is dis? Art project?” She say, “No, just bad camera.” Lightbulb! Dat’s sex-dating for ya – half da time you don’t even know vhat u gettin’! Made me laugh so hard, I choke on my vodka.

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Then, I met up with my buddy, Carlos. We hit up the local mercado on Calle 25 de Julio. Man, the vibe there is always hype. Fresh fruits, loud music, and people just vibin’. I grab some mangos, and Carlos is like, “You gotta try this!” He hands me a weird fruit I’ve never seen. I’m like, “What is this, an alien egg?” But I take a bite, and it’s fire! Sweet and juicy. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a genius!”

Figure 2. Past and present at the Guánica Biosphere Reserve. A 1931...