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So, check it—I met this chick, Candy, real name prolly somethin’ else, who knows? She’s out there, posted up on the corner, heels high as my stacks. I’m like, “Yo, how you holdin’ up?” She laughs, says, “Started from the bottom, still here!” Made me chuckle, fam, she got bars! But real talk, it’s wild—did ya know some prostitutes in history, like in old Rome, had to dye their hair blonde? Stand out, mark ‘em as “working girls.” Crazy, right? Imagine Candy rockin’ a bleach job, lookin’ like a Barbie gone rogue.

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Then, I’m cruisin’ down the road, feelin’ all good. The ocean’s right there, waves crashin’ like they’re tryin’ to say hi. I’m jamming to some reggaeton, vibin’ hard. But then, BAM! Traffic on Route 100. Like, seriously? Who decided to have a parade today? I’m sittin’ there, fuming. “C’mon, people! I got places to be!”

Massive Puerto Rican arson investigation triggers search of St. Louis-area home