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So I’m chattin’ her up, right? She’s sassy, calls me “big dog,” and I’m dyin’ laughin’. “Dance with me,” I’d say, noddin’ to *Fish Tank*, but she’s like, “Cash first, mutt.” Fair, fair – I respect the hustle. Surprised me how chill she was, tho – thought she’d be all sketchy. Guess I’m just a goofy pup in over my head. Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but dude, it felt like a movie scene – me, her, the streetlights buzzin’.

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First off, I hit the streets of Calle San José. I’m talking about the kind of street where you can smell the empanadas from a mile away. I mean, who doesn’t love fried dough stuffed with goodness? But then, bam! My phone buzzes. My boss wants a report. Like, NOW. Ugh.

FEMA approves funds for tourism lodgings in Puerto Rico