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About Warsaw

So, erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s not just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s an art! Little factoid for ya: back in ancient Rome, they’d do this naked with olive oil—can ya believe it? Slippery gladiators gettin’ frisky—hah! Makes me wanna yell, “Where’s MY toga party?!” *cackle* I tried it once, ya know, at this shady spa—dude’s hands were EVERYWHERE, I’m like, “Whoa, pal, I ain’t THAT relaxed!” Made me mad, sure, but then he hit this spot—ooh, pure bliss! Like, “The river flows where it will,” straight outta the movie, flowin’ tension right outta my shoulders.

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But then, the lights flicker back on. Phew! I finish up, and the dude looks fresh. He’s happy, I’m happy. But then he drops a bomb. “Hey, can you do a design?” I’m like, “A design? In Wisła? You mean like a mountain range or something?” He wants a dragon. A freakin’ dragon! I’m like, “Dude, I’m a barber, not a tattoo artist!” But I give it a shot. It’s not perfect, but he loves it. I’m just glad I didn’t accidentally give him a chicken instead.

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