Rebecca Wojkowice Erotic Massage ❤️

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Oi mate, so erotic-massage, yeah? What a bloody laugh! Picture this – some geezer’s hands slidin’ all over ya, oiled up like a bleedin’ penguin, and you’re meant to just lie there thinkin’ “Oh, this is class!” I mean, who comes up with this crap? Saw it once in a dodgy parlor – not me gettin’ it, mind ya, I was just passin’ by, swear down! – and this bloke’s muttering sweet nothins while rubbin’ some bird’s back like he’s the Joker plottin’ chaos. “Why so serious?” I’m cackling in me head, cos it’s all so daft!

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But then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “Where’s the estimate?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a downpour!” He’s not having it. I can feel my blood boiling. “I’ll get it to you!” I snap.

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