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Alright, mate, sexual-massage—where do I start? It’s like a freakin’ unicorn, everybody’s heard of it, nobody’s sure it’s real. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—half the time, it’s just a fancy word for some shady parlor trick. “Everybody lies,” right? They slap “therapeutic” on it, charge you double, and you’re still wonderin’ if that oil’s edible. Sarcasm’s my shield, but damn, this topic’s a minefield!

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But here’s where it gets wild. I’m sitting on a bench, just chilling, when I see this guy in a suit. In Szczytno? Really? He’s pacing back and forth, talking on his phone like he’s about to close a million-dollar deal. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re in a small town, chill out!” But then, he trips over a rock and falls flat on his face. I couldn’t help it—I laughed so hard, I almost spilled my coffee. Karma, man.

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