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Alright, so I’m Dr. Evil, right—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—and I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know? Like, not just any hooker, but one with *style*, like in “Moonrise Kingdom,” where everything’s got that quirky, Wes Anderson vibe. Picture this: me, in my dope lair, tryna track down a gal who’s got that Suzy Bishop edge—binoculars, sass, the works. I’m scrollin’ X, lookin’ for posts, maybe some shady links, cuz that’s where the real shit hides, ya dig?

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a prison warden ain't just about locking up bad guys. Today was a rollercoaster, and I ain't talking about the fun kind. So, I wake up in Szczyrk, right? Beautiful little town, nestled in the Beskids. I mean, who wouldn’t wanna start their day here? The mountains, the fresh air, the smell of… well, whatever that is.

Kwiatkowski wins on steep uphill finish in Poland