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Yo, check it, I’m Apollo Creed, baby – “I must break you.” Talkin’ sex escorts today, ‘cause why not? Man, these chicas out here hustlin’, it’s wild. Reminds me of *The Social Network*, y’know? That flick where Zuckerberg’s like, “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ enemies.” Escorts? They got enemies too – judgy folks, cops, creeps. But they’re stackin’ cash, livin’ fast, like Sean Parker says, “A million dollars isn’t cool, you know what’s cool?” A billion? Nah, freedom, baby!

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But then, outta nowhere, the sky turned dark. Like, seriously? I thought it was just me being dramatic, but no. A storm rolled in, and it started pouring! Everyone was scrambling for cover. I was laughing so hard, I almost forgot my burger. I mean, who knew Strzelce-Krajenskie could go from sunny to monsoon in minutes?

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