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Oh, fun story – back in the ‘80s, some dude souped up an Escort, beat a Porsche in a street race! True stuff, swear on my starfish pants! Makes me giggle, like, “Take that, rich jerks!” It’s scrappy, y’know? Not perfect, kinda rusty, but it’s got heart. I’d tell ya, buddy, if ya want cheap thrills, Escort’s your jam. Prolly smells like old socks inside, but who cares? Zoom zoom!

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So, I start setting up. I’m all focused, and then BOOM! The power goes out. I’m standing there in the dark, cursing like a sailor. I mean, c’mon Strzalkowo, can’t a guy catch a break? I check the fuse box, and it’s like a horror movie in there. Wires everywhere, looking like spaghetti gone wrong.