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About Lodz

So, Escort, right? Ford’s cheap-ass answer to makin’ cars for broke losers in the ‘80s and ‘90s. I’m talkin’ hatchbacks and sedans that look like a sad lunchbox on wheels. Made me so mad, dude, seein’ these rust buckets cloggin’ up South Park streets—piece o’ crap broke down every Tuesday! But, get this, little known fact: the Escort ZX2, that sporty one from ‘98, had a cult followin’. Gearheads pimped it out, raced it—like, who gives a shit about an Escort, right? Surprised the hell outta me, I was like, “What in the actual fuck?”

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a bodyguard in Sedziszow-Malopolski is like being in a movie, but not the cool action ones. More like a low-budget flick with bad plot twists. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m thinking, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

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