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Personal quirk, yeah—I’m proper loud when it’s good. Moanin’ like, “YEAH, THAT’S IT!” Neighbours prob think I’m mad. Once had this lass in Brixton, hands like a goddess, swear down. She knew pressure points I didn’t even know existed! Surprised me, fam, had me floatin’. But then, this other time, some bloke rushed it—barely 10 mins! I was fumin’, like, “Bruv, where’s the love?”

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Then, I see this old man selling handmade crafts. His stuff is amazing! I buy a little wooden bird. It’s cute, and I’m feeling good again. But then, I realize I left my phone at the market stall. Panic mode activated! I sprint back, heart racing. Thankfully, the guy is holding it. “You dropped this, young one,” he says. I’m like, “You’re a lifesaver!”

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