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Yo, dude, eat my shorts! Escorts, man, they’re wild! Like, I’m talkin’ about those fancy schmancy cars, right? Not the shady stuff—get yer mind outta the gutter! I’m obsessed with “Children of Men,” that flick’s dope. “The world’s gone mad,” like Clive Owen says, and escorts fit right in. They’re these beefy rides, haul dudes around, all secret-like. Back in the day, Ford Escort—total classic, bro! 1968, rolled out in Britain, tiny but scrappy. Kinda like me, short but badass, ya know?

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Finally, I get my black gold and head to the plaza. The vibe is buzzing. Street performers everywhere, people laughing, kids running around. I’m feeling it, ya know? But then, outta nowhere, this kid trips and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Ugh! I mean, come on! My kicks were fresh! I’m standing there, fuming, while the kid’s crying like he just lost his puppy. I can’t be mad at him, though. I mean, who can resist ice cream?