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I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a trip—makes me happy as a pig in mud thinkin’ ‘bout somebody treatin’ me like royalty, rubbin’ me down real good. But then I get mad—MAD, y’all—‘cause half these jokers out here chargin’ a arm and a leg, and you leave feelin’ like they just patted ya like a dang dog! Rip-off artists, I swear! One time, I almost went myself—thought, “Madea, you deserve this!”—but I chickened out, ‘fraid they’d see my bunions and start laughin’. Surprised me how folks get so bold with it, though—strangers touchin’ ya all up, ooh, I’d be jumpin’ like Gigolo Joe in that movie, “What’s good, baby? What’s good?”

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After that, I’m feeling a bit defeated, but whatever. We keep fishing, and I finally catch a decent-sized pike. I’m pumped! I’m like, “This is it! Dinner’s on me!” But then, just as I’m about to reel it in, this old guy walks by. He’s got this serious face, and he’s like, “You know, you’re not supposed to fish here.” I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’m not hurting anyone.” But he just shakes his head and walks off.

Building believed to be oldest house in Grochów will undergo renovation