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Oh, and get this—some places, they sneak in these “extras,” right? Little known fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—sexual-massage joints! Started after the war, soldiers wantin’ a rub-and-tug! Insane! I’m not sayin’ I’d go, but I’m fascinated—how do they not laugh? I’d crack up! Me, naked, oily, some stranger’s hands—hilarious! But also, ugh, I’d die of shame. “Don’t look at me!” I’d yell, like in the movie, “It’s not my fault!”—blamin’ everyone else!

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So, I get to the field, and it’s a mess. Like, weeds everywhere! I’m talking about a jungle, not a farm. I’m trying to explain to the farmers about crop rotation, and they’re just staring at me like I’m speaking Martian. I’m like, “C’mon, guys! It’s not rocket science!” But they just shrug. Ugh, so frustrating!

Black Death did not reach Poland, according to peat bog evidence