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About Warsaw

I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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So, I head out to the market on ul. Wojska Polskiego. It’s buzzing, as usual. People everywhere, haggling over veggies and stuff. I love the vibe, but today? Too many people. I’m dodging old ladies with their carts like it’s an obstacle course. One almost took me out! I mean, c’mon, lady, I’m just trying to get some fresh herbs for my pottery glaze.

Kamil Majchrzak