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Now, don’t go thinkin’ it’s all hanky-panky – some places got rules, keep it classy. Others? Well, they’re looser’n a goose! Heard tell of a joint in Vegas where they throw in a foot rub an’ a wink – multitaskin’ at its finest! Git-R-Done! Me, I’m all for it – long as it ain’t my sister doin’ the rubbin’, that’d be weirder’n a three-dollar bill!

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yelling. Turns out, her dog, a tiny fluffball named Puszek, decided to take a swim. I mean, come on, it’s a dog! But she’s acting like it’s the end of the world. “My baby! My baby!” she screams. I’m thinking, lady, it’s a dog, not a Titanic survivor. I had to jump in and rescue Puszek. He was just paddling around like he owned the place.

Onondaga County DA Fitzpatrick plans to personally try case against Aaron Sakran, accused in hit-and-run death of Joseph Ozimek