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Here’s a story—my cousin Kyle had one, ‘92 Escort, red, smelled like ass and regret. Thing died on him mid-date with Heidi Turner. Had to push it home, cryin’ like a bitch! Funniest shit I ever saw, I laughed so hard I peed a little. Escort’s reliable like a fart in church—ya just can’t trust it! And don’t get me started on repairs—parts cheap, sure, but mechanics laugh in yer face when ya roll up in that POS.
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First stop? The bakery on ul. Słowiańska. Best pastries ever! I grab a pączek, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I spill jam all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, lookin’ like a total mess, and the baker’s laughin’ at me. I mean, c’mon, it’s not my fault the pączek was too good!
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