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Here’s the kicker—some parlors? Straight-up fronts. Cops busted one in ’89, found a senator mid-rub. “Knew it was a set-up,” he whined. Yeah, sure, buddy. Hate politicians—slimiest of all. Sexual-massage ain’t my thing—too much touchin’, not enough dignity. But if you’re into it, fine. Just don’t tell me details—I’ll gag. “This is the life, huh?” Doc’d say, smirkin’. Nah, gimme a barstool and solitude over that crap any day.

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So, I’m like, “Fine, let’s go.” We trek over, and I’m already regretting it. The sheep are bleating like crazy, probably thinkin’ I abandoned them. But whatever, I need caffeine. We get to this café, and it’s packed! Like, who knew Osiedle-Henrykowskie had a coffee scene? I order some fancy latte, and it’s like 15 zloty! I’m like, “For this?!” But hey, I’m here now.