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What gets me? The sneaky stuff! Didja know some masseuses train for YEARS to find them secret spots? Not the obvious ones, hon—those lil’ nooks that make ya gasp! I’m talkin’ behind the knees, or that dip by yer collarbone—surprised the heck outta me! One time, this chick’s whisperin’, “Relax, Fran,” and I’m thinkin’, “Honey, I’m wound tighter than a perm!” *cackle* But then—bam—she’s kneadin’ my calves, and I’m floatin’ like Pocahontas seein’ John Smith for the first time. “What new world is this?”—yep, movie line, but it’s MY new world now!

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So, I rally the troops. We’re out there, searching high and low. I’m calling in favors, “Hey, you seen a little dog? Brown, fluffy?” People are coming out of their houses, helping. It’s wild! And then, boom! We find the pup! The kid’s face lights up like it’s Christmas. I’m tearing up a bit, not gonna lie.

Canadian Imam Criticizes Youth for Ignoring ‘Good Role Models’ in Sermon on Sinwar’s Killing