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You try, my friend, find good place, not shady one with weird smell. Cost me 20 dollar once, worth it, but don’t tell wife, she say, “Borat, you naughty!” I say, “For health, like meditation!” Very nice! What you think? Sexy, yes? Go get, enjoy, “all things return to one!” Like movie, but with happy endin’, hehe!

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But then, outta nowhere, this old lady starts yelling. Turns out, her cat’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a cat, not a lion!” But she’s frantic. So, I climb the tree. Yeah, me! The Herald, tree climber extraordinaire. I finally get the cat down, and she’s all teary-eyed. I’m feeling like a hero, but also thinking, “What’s next? Saving a dog from a burning building?”

What pre-pesach cleaning was like in the shtetl