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Heya buddy! So, like, erotic-massage, right? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—is mayonnaise an instrument? Nah, but hands are, heh! Imagine this: slippery, oily hands slidin’ all over ya, like in “A.I.” when David’s all, “I’m real, touch me!” Except, this ain’t no robot love—just pure, squishy human vibes. I’m an anticorrosion agent, so I’m all about protectin’ stuff, but this? This protects yer soul from rustin’, ya know?

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But then, something amazing happened. I met this old lady, right? She’s sitting next to me, knitting away. We start chatting, and she tells me about her garden. Turns out, she’s got the most insane collection of heirloom tomatoes. I’m talking colors I’ve never seen! She offers me some seeds, and I’m like, “Heck yes!” I mean, who wouldn’t want to grow rainbow tomatoes?

KAI opens office in Polish Air Force base