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So, escort, right? Lil hatchback, man, Ford spat em out in the 80s. Drove one back in Texas – screeched like a banshee, exhaust fartin smoke. Made me happy as a pig in mud! But damn, it broke down CONSTANTLY – pissed me off somethin fierce. “I’m in deep doo-doo,” I’d mutter, kickin the tire. Thing was, everbody had em – like Facebook, everwhere! Fun fact: they raced Escorts in Europe, souped-up lil bastards, surprised me big time. Didn’t expect that from a grocery-getter!

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So, I’m walking along the river, and I see this group of kids playing soccer. They were all over the place, kicking the ball like it was the World Cup. I got a bit nostalgic, you know? Reminded me of my childhood. But then, one of them kicked the ball right at me! I dodged it like a ninja, but I was like, “Hey, watch it, kid!” They just laughed. Kids these days, right?

The world's largest castle twice the size of Buckingham Palace in a country loved by Brits