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About Lodz

I’m ramblin’, but sex-dating’s a trip. You dodge creeps like IEDs—“This is my war, my war!”—and then, boom, you find a gem. I’m chattin’ this dude once, he’s all smooth, then sends a pic—fish tank in the back! I’m like, “Oh, carrots, I’m in love!” Total nerd moment, got me gigglin’. But then, ugh, the ghostin’—makes me wanna scream, “Where’s the kaboom?!” Hate that, doc, hate it!

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I’m behind the counter, and my coworker, Kasia, is already in a mood. She’s like, “Where were you?” I’m like, “Dude, I was saving the world, obviously.” But she’s not having it. Whatever. I start making lattes, and let me tell you, the milk frother is acting up. It’s like it has a mind of its own. I’m wrestling with it, and it sprays milk everywhere. I’m covered in foam. Great start, right?

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