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Oi, ever tried it? Slippery as a Hutt’s deal! Reckon it’s ace for stress—muscles all tight, then bam, loose as a Wookiee’s roar. Sarcasm time: yeah, totally just “relaxation,” nothin’ suss there, eh? R2-D2, where are you? Need ya to zap some sense into these shady joints! Dunno, mate, it’s a weird gig—half lush, half “what the kriff?”—but damn, it’s a story! “This is the kill,” like Bigelow’s crew’d say—sexual-massage nails ya one way or another!

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Then, I get a text from my boss. “Where are you?” Oh man, I’m in trouble. I tell Janek I gotta bounce. He’s like, “C’mon, just a few more minutes!” But I can’t. I sprint back to the office, heart racing.

More Tender, More Intimate: 2020 in Polish Literature