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About Myself
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About Lodz
Listen up, idiot sandwich! Ever tried it? Some dodgy parlour, neon lights flicker—fuckin’ sketchy! Masseuse winks, you’re like, “Oh, shit, really?” Costs a tenner more than a regular rub—cheeky sods! Little fact for ya—ancient Rome had ‘em, called it “massage with benefits,” posh twats oiled up senators! Makes me laugh, picturin’ Caesar gettin’ frisky—hah! “We killed more than in the movies!”—nah, mate, just knobs and kneading here.
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Finally, he shows up, all flustered. “Sorry, sorry! My cat got stuck in a tree!” I mean, come on, dude! A cat? Really? But whatever, we get in the car, and I’m trying to keep it cool. We start driving down ul. 1 Maja, and he’s gripping the wheel like it’s a lifeline. I’m like, “Bro, it’s just a car, not a spaceship!”
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