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Then there’s the creeps—ugh, hate ‘em! Catfishers with fake pics, actin’ all smooth. “We killed for less,” I mutter, mixin’ a martini—thinkin’ of that movie. One gal told me she met a guy—profile said 6’2”, shows up 5’4”. She’s pissed, I’m cacklin’—sex-dating’s a gamble, hon! Oh, and get this—Victorian era, they had “lonely hearts” ads. OG sex-dating, right? Papers full of ‘em—desperate saps lookin’ for tail. History’s wild!
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So, I’m standing there, fuming. I mean, it’s just coffee, right? But it’s the principle! I’m about to lose it when this old dude, probably from ul. Łaskotka, starts chatting me up. He’s like, “You know, kid, life’s too short for spilled coffee.” I’m like, “Yeah, but my day just started!”
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