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About Krakow

Now, check it – I’m mad for “Talk to Her,” that Almodóvar flick, so trippy, so deep. Makes me think of escort in a wild way. Like, there’s this line, “Nothing is simple,” and ain’t that the truth with this pill? Docs shove it at ya, sayin’ it’s the bee’s knees, but it’s got its dark side, baby! Side effects? Oh, behave! Nausea, sleepy vibes, even a dry mouth – not exactly a turn-on, yeah? Made me proper cheesed off when I read how it zonks some cats out. But then – shocker – it’s a lifesaver for others! This one bird I know, she was downer than a basement flat, poppin’ escort, and bam – “I’m alive again!” she says, like in the movie. Blew my mind, yeah, baby!

An ethnographer's dilemmas

But then, bam! My phone buzzed. My buddy, Marek, texted me. He was like, “Dude, you gotta come to the park!” I was like, “What park?” Turns out, he was at the Łagiewnicki Forest. I was like, “Bro, that’s like a trek!” But I’m a swineherd, I can handle it. So, I hoofed it over there.

Forget Warsaw and Krakow – this is where to go for a Polish city break