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But ugh, some creeps ruin it—sleazy parlors, fake “happy endings.” Pisses me off! It’s not that, dahlings, it’s therapy with spice. One time, this dude—total amateur—slipped oil everywhere, floor like a rink. I’m yelling, “No capes, no spills, genius!” Laughed my ass off, tho. Happy accidents, right? Surprised me how goofy it got.
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So, I finally get my coffee, and I sit outside. The sun’s shining, and I’m just enjoying the moment. But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain! Like, what the heck? I’m scrambling to grab my stuff, and I end up spilling my coffee all over myself. Great. Just great. Now I’m a soggy mess with coffee stains.
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