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We head to this shady motel, smells like piss and regret. She’s all business, no chit-chat, which I dig. I’m sittin’ there, watchin’ her peel off this ratty jacket, thinkin’, “This is my algorithm now.” Like Zuckerberg buildin’ Facebook, I’m buildin’ my night—except mine’s dirtier, ha! Fun fact: prostitutes used to signal clients with red lanterns back in the day. Bet she don’t know that. Bet she don’t care.

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So, I finally get my coffee, and I sit outside. The sun’s shining, and I’m just enjoying the moment. But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain! Like, what the heck? I’m scrambling to grab my stuff, and I end up spilling my coffee all over myself. Great. Just great. Now I’m a soggy mess with coffee stains.