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Anyways, I reckon escorts are ace – pure ’60s swagger. They’re the dolly birds or cool cats who’ve got yer back, no fuss. Once knew this one chick, total fox, escorted me to a gig – had me laughin’ ’til I cried, spillin’ me drink everywhere! Clumsy ol’ me, yeah? But she was tops – kept the baddies off me tail. Love that, baby! So, escort’s where it’s at – groovy, wild, and a bit bonkers. Like Boonmee says, “Time bends, man, it bends!” Yeah, baby, yeah!

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So, I decide to grab a coffee at this little café on ul. Słowackiego. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a cappuccino, and the barista, this cool chick, gives me a wink. I’m like, “Whoa, did I just get flirted with?” But then she spills hot milk all over the counter. Classic. I’m trying not to laugh, but it’s hard. She’s all flustered, and I’m just sitting there, sipping my drink, thinking, “This is the best show in town.”

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