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Dahling, strap in, it’s Edna Mode—*No capes!*—talkin’ erotic-massage! I’m a Research Associate, sure, but this? This is juicy! Picture it: dim lights, oiled hands, tension meltin’ like butter. I’m obsessed, ok? Reminds me of *Toni Erdmann*—you know, my fave flick—where Winfried’s all awkward, tryna connect, but with erotic-massage? Connection’s the whole damn point! “I’m not a baby, I’m a woman!”—that’s me, screamin’ it, ‘cause this ain’t kid stuff, it’s raw, real, *sensual*.

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So, I’m wanderin’ around, and I bump into this dude named Janek. He’s a local, and he’s got all these wild stories about the town. Apparently, there’s a ghost in the old spa building. I’m like, “For real?” He’s all serious, sayin’ the ghost loves to mess with tourists. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need. A ghost on my day off.”

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