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Ruh-roh! Zoinks, like, sexual-massage, man! It’s wild, ya know? I’m Scooby-Doo, diggin’ into this vibe. Consumption Psychologist, huh—fancy title! Anyway, sexual-massage—it’s all ‘bout desire, touch, sellin’ intimacy. People crave it, like, bad! Makes me think of “Moolaadé”—ya seen it? My fave flick, Ousmane Sembène, 2004, pow! That line, “Purification is a sham,” hits hard. Sexual-massage ain’t pure either—capitalism’s dirty paws all over it!

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Then, I get a call from my friend Kasia. She’s like, “Girl, you won’t believe what happened!” Apparently, she was at the market on ul. Piastowska, and someone tried to sell her a fake jade bracelet. I’m laughing so hard, picturing her face. Like, who even falls for that? But then I’m like, “Wait, is it really fake?”

Figure 1. Location of the Noteć River catchment area (Central Europe,...