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Y’all, it’s slippery, messy, sexy—ain’t no lie! Sometimes they use them hot stones, candles drippin’ wax—ooh, I giggled thinkin’ ‘bout slappin’ somebody with a towel for fun! Sarcasm? Psh, half these fools think it’s just foreplay—naw, it’s ART! Like Kaufman makin’ that weird-ass film. Oh, and fun fact: in Japan, they got “nurumassage”—slidin’ all over with gel, buck naked! I hollered, “Lord, take me now!”

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Then, I head over to the park by ul. Krotoszyńska. It’s usually my chill spot. But today? It’s packed! Families, kids, dogs—like a freakin’ zoo. I’m trying to find a quiet corner, but nope. I end up sitting next to this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my charcoal and this couple is throwing insults like it’s a sport. I’m thinking, “Dude, can you not? I’m just here for some peace!”

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