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So, I dig into dis—little known fact, ja? Back in ancient China, dey called it “tuina” with a twist, sneaky emperors got it wit happy endings! True story, blew my mind! Makes me happy, ‘cause history’s wild, right? But den I get mad—why ain’t dis talked about more? It’s legit, therapeutic, not just naughty stuff! I’m like, “I’ll be back,” ‘cause dis needs respect, ya hear me?

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I woke up early, like, way too early. The roosters were still snoozin’ when I dragged myself outta bed. I live near the park on ul. Wojska Polskiego, and lemme tell ya, it’s usually peaceful. But not today! I step outside, and boom! There’s a parade or somethin’ goin’ on. Like, who even organizes a parade on a Tuesday?

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