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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets me all flustered. Picture this, right – hands sliding, oils dripping, bit of a cheeky rub-down. Reminds me of that film I love, *Talk to Her*. Pedro Almodóvar, genius chap, knows how to stir the soul. “The skin reveals what’s inside,” he says – bloody true with erotic-massage! Skin’s the canvas, innit? Tells tales without a word.

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After that chaos, I finish the window. The lady’s thrilled, and I’m like, “Great, one down, a million to go.” I head over to ul. Stawna next. This place is a bit sketchy, but hey, work is work. I’m fixing a shop window for some dude who sells antiques. He’s super picky, like, “Make sure it’s perfect!” I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s glass, not a Picasso.”

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