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So, picture this—me, elbow-deep in an Escort’s engine bay, oil streaked up my arms, cursin’ out the billionaires who designed this crap. That 1.9-liter four-banger? Gutless! Barely 90 horsepower, sputters like a tired old dog. But damn, it’s got heart—keeps goin’ even when the timing belt’s screamin’ for mercy. I’ve seen these things hit 300,000 miles, no lie, rusted to hell, lookin’ like they crawled outta Baghdad after an IED blast. “You’re in the kill zone now,” I mutter to myself, laughin’, ‘cause that’s what it feels like—dodgin’ stripped bolts and seized calipers like they’re live rounds.

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I’m thinkin’, “What could possibly be so wild in Jaworze?” But hey, I’m always up for an adventure. So, I grab my stuff and head out. First off, the drive through the countryside is beautiful. The hills, the trees, the fresh air. But then I hit the town, and it’s like, whoa!

Polish mayor falls to death from hotel balcony in Sardinia, Italy