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But ugh, the fakes! Catfish city! One guy said he’s 6’2”—showed up, 5’5”! I’m like, “You’re not my land to claim!”—movie line, boom! Made me laugh tho, he tried. Gotta give props for guts. Sex-dating’s a jungle, hon—swipe, flirt, pray. Some nights yer happy, some yer cryin’. Once saw a profile: “Just want head.” I’m like, REALLY?! *nasally scoff* Classy!
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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Tomek. He’s like, “Hey, wanna grab a drink later?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m knee-deep in history here!” But then I think, “Why not?” I mean, I deserve a break after this chaos.
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