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So, lemme tell ya—met this chick online once. Profile said “adventurous,” I’m like, cool, let’s roll! Turns out, she meant sex in a cave. A CAVE, man! Pitch black, bats flyin’, my ass scrapin’ rocks. Thought I’d die happy—or just die. Laughed my head off after—still smell the damp. Little secret? Miners used to hook up underground—true story! Old timers called it “shaft shaggin’.” History’s freaky, huh?

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But then, disaster strikes. Some kid knocks over my display. Bread goes flyin’ everywhere! I’m like, “Nooooo!” I’m tryin’ to salvage what I can, but it’s a mess. I’m angry, but then I see the kid’s face. He’s so sorry, and I can’t stay mad. I just laugh it off. “Hey, kid, you owe me a loaf!”

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