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So, I’m watchin’ “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—y’know, my fave, Spielberg’s a madman—and there’s Gigolo Joe, that smooth robot bastard, struttin’ around, “What do you want, baby?” I’m sittin’ there, screamin’ at the TV, “Sexual-massage, Joe, that’s the ticket!” Imagine it—robots doin’ this gig, no tired hands, no awkward small talk. “Are you fully functional?”—hell yeah, they’d be! I’d invest in that startup yesterday. Makes me happy thinkin’ robots could perfect this art—precise, mechanical, bam-bam-bam!

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First off, I’m at the building on ul. Piłsudskiego, and the elevator’s already acting up. Like, c’mon! It’s not even 9 AM! I’m tryin’ to fix it, and this lady comes in, all frazzled. She’s like, “I’m late for a meeting!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m late for my coffee!” But I hit the button, and we’re off.

Man found guilty over sex act on train that frightened teenage girl