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Sometiems I wonder—am I too old for this? Nah, screw that! Sexual-massage ain’t just for young punks—it’s for anyone with a pulse! Surprised me how it’s all legal in some spots—Vegas, baby! Had a chick tell me once, “it’s therapy, not dirty”—yeah, right, lady, therapy with a happy ending! D’oh! Still, she wasn’t wrong—relaxes ya, but also, damn, gets the blood pumpin’!

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So, I decide to take a break. I hit up this little café on ul. Kwiatowa. Best coffee in Grabiszynek, no joke. I grab a cappuccino and sit outside, just trying to catch my breath. But then, this kid runs by, playing soccer, and BOOM! He kicks the ball right into my table. Coffee everywhere! I’m like, “Seriously?!”