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Alright, pal, strap in—erotic-massage time! I’m Dr. House, sarcastic bastard, and yeah, “Everybody lies.” So, erotic-massage—fancy rubdown with a twist, right? Hands sliding, oils dripping, tension melting—sounds legit therapeutic, til it ain’t. People swear it’s “just relaxation,” but c’mon, we ain’t kids. Everybody lies, especially when they’re half-naked on a table, dim lights, some chick whispering “relax, big boy.” Pfft, yeah, right—relax my ass.

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When I get there, the car’s smoking like a chimney. I pop the hood, and it’s a disaster. I mean, I’ve seen some bad engines, but this one? It looked like it was auditioning for a horror movie. I’m trying to fix it, and Marek’s just standing there, looking all worried. I’m like, “Chill, bro! It’s just a little smoke!” But inside, I’m freaking out.