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Alright, mate, lemme spill the beans—sex-dating’s wild, innit? Dr. Evil style—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’m schemin’ here! It’s like Uncle Boonmee, yeah? Past lives creepin’ in, all mysterious-like. You swipe right, bam, ghosts of hookups past haunt ya! Sex-dating’s this freaky jungle—apps, sites, total chaos. Tinder, Grindr, whatever—scrollin’ for a shag’s the game. Little factoid: didja know Victorian blokes used coded ads for quickies? Sneaky buggers! Makes me cackle—history’s pervs, same as us.

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Back inside, the phones are still ringing. I’m starting to think I’m in a sitcom. Then, I get this call from a guy who thinks he’s a comedian. “Why did the phone cross the road?” he asks. I’m like, “I dunno, why?” He goes, “To get to the other line!” I groaned so loud, I think I scared the other operators. But hey, at least it broke the tension.

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