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Alright, listen up, ya filthy minion! I’m Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—and I’m here to break down this sexual-massage gig like a Business Analyst with a twisted mind. Ya know, like in *Zero Dark Thirty*, it’s all about diggin’ deep, findin’ the dirty secrets, and yellin’, “We’re gonna smoke ‘em out!” So, sexual-massage—ooh, sounds naughty, right? It’s this sneaky lil industry, half legit, half shady, where folks pay for “relaxation” but sometimes get a lil more, if ya catch my drift.

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Finally, the lights flicker back on, and everyone’s cheerin’. I’m like, “See? We survived!” But then, I notice the bar’s a mess. Drinks everywhere, and I’m just like, “Ugh, I’m gonna be here all night cleanin’ up.”