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So, I’m picturin’ it – some dimly lit joint, oil slicker than a riverboat gambler, and you’re just layin’ there, stoic as hell. “Whoa.” It’s not just rubbin’ – it’s art, bro. Little known fact? Back in ancient China, emperors got this shit to “balance their chi” – yeah, sexual-massage was royal as fuck. Bet Jesse James would’ve traded his six-shooter for that after a heist.

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Finally, the day winds down. I’m exhausted but kinda proud of myself. I survived the madness. I grab my stuff and head out. As I walk down ul. Wrocławska, I see a bunch of friends hanging out. They’re laughing, and I can’t help but join in. We end up at that little bar near the square. You know the one? It’s got the best pierogi in town.

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