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I’m sittin here, imaginin it – dim lights, soft music, maybe some foresty incense burnin. Hands kneadin, explorin, not rushin nowhere. It’s sensual as hell, not just horny vibes. Little fact for ya – in Japan, they got this thing called Nuru massage. Slippery seaweed gel, bodies slidin like eels – blew my damn mind! Ever tried that? Probs not, most folks stick to basic back rubs.

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Then, I get a call from a client. He’s freaking out about his upcoming match. I’m like, “Dude, breathe! You got this!” But he’s all, “What if I mess up?” I’m like, “Bro, you’re in Czluchow! Just think of it as a practice game.” But he’s not having it. I’m trying to be the calm in his storm, but inside, I’m like, “Why do I even do this?”

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