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But ugh, the stench of it all—sweat, desperation, like a cave full o’ dead fish. Reminds me o’ them dark ops in the film, all sneaky and rotten. Ever wonder how they sleep? Prostitutes, I mean. Bet they don’t—haunted, they is, by every grubby hand. We hates it! Hates how it’s old as dirt too—back in Rome, they had ‘em marked with tattoos, little known fact that! Branded like cattle, makes me spit.

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I decide to take a drive around the lake, you know, to clear my head. The view is stunning! The sun is setting, and the water looks like liquid gold. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “Man, life is good.” But then I hit a pothole. Seriously, Chodzież, fix your roads! I almost spill my drink all over myself.

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